SCENE I
[Moria]
Faramir: I liked the white better.
Arsenie: Dan's gonna get his ass kicked! Dan's gonna get his ass kicked! Haha!!
Dan: Will you shut up!
Arsenie: [sticks out tongue]
Gandalf: Are you ready to dieeeeee, Dan Bălan?
Dan: Yeeeeeeeeeaaah. Oh, no, wait, can I have a muffin first?
Gandalf: Eh, sure, what the hey. [hands Dan a muffin]
Arsenie: But... but... where did you get that? I want one too!!
Gandalf: The bakery. And muffins are for either people who deserve them or people who are about to be killed, not selfish little children like you, Senny.
Arsenie: [pouts]
Gandalf: Are you done eating the muffin yet?
Dan: [swallows last bite of muffin] Yeah.
Gandalf: Excellent. Now are you ready to dieeeeeeee?
Dan: Yeeeeeeeeeah.
SCENE II
[Eriador]
Frodo: [yelling incoherently and pounding his fists on the ground beneath a tree]
Igpay Atinlay: Utshay upay!
Frodo: [stops yelling and looks around]
Igpay: Esyay, iay eanmay ouyay! Atway areay ouyay oingday?
Frodo: Are you... speaking that crazy language? Dragostea din Tei!!! Aaah!!
Igpay: Atway? iay antcay understanday ouryay anguagelay.
Frodo: [runs away]
Igpay: Utbay ouyay avehay otay explainay ootay emay atway Aiduciihay isay!! ... amnday.
SCENE III
[Moria]
Gandalf: Excellent. Now are you ready to dieeeeeeee?
Dan: Yeeeeeeeeeah.
Gandalf: Avada Kedav--
Dan: Wait!
Gandalf: What is it now? I'm not giving you another muffin...
Dan: No, that's not it. Aren't you supposed to like, be under the DdT mind control thingy?
Faramir: That only works for the White Wizard, not the Rainbow Wizard, dumbass.
Dan: Oh...
Back to Act XII
Contents
On to Act XIII