Ştii că eşti un vicios ei dragostea din tei când...

Info: în întrebarele ca are "fratele tău," poţi să utilizezi "prietenul" dacă n-ai un frate.

Ştii că eşti un vicios ei dragostea din tei când...

Ştii ce este Dragostea din tei. (eu sunt vinovată)

Şi insişti ca nu e Numa Numa, Ma Ya Hii, etc (vinovată)

Ştii că "Numa" e un nume arabic şi înseamnă "plăcere." (vinovată)

Ai şoc pentru că e intelegent.

Nu, nu, într-adevăr, n-ai şoc. (vinovată)

Ai ascultat mai de 50x. (vinovată)

Consecutiv. (vinovată)

Ai memorat versurile. (vinovată)

Le cânţi oricând poţi.

Chiar de eşti cu persoane ce cred că cânţi ca un puişor fără un cap.

Ai visat despre Dan Bălan. (vinovată)

Ştii cine e Dan Bălan. (vinovată)

Ştii ce trăieşte în Los Angeles. Şi are un MySpace. Şi că MySpace lui e http://www.myspace.com/balanmusic. (vinovată)

Ştii cine sunt Arsenie Toderaş şi Radu Sîrbu. (vinovată)

Ai visat despre ei. (vinovată)

Acest când te-a inspirit să numeşti copiii tăi ceba română. (vinovată)

Vei numi copiii tăi Dan, Arsenie şi Radu.

Chiar de copiii tăi sunt fete.

Ştii email-address lui Gary Brolsma.

Ştii email-address lui Dan, Radu sau Arsenie. (vinovată)

Şi inundezi inbox lui. Dar e doar "să trimite fanmail."

Te-a raspuns.

Pentru cauzi ce nu sunt "te rog nu-mi inundezi inbox meu pentru că vreau să omorăsc pisicuţe."

Ai o cameră în casa ta care e dedicat doar pentru O-zone. Familia ta le numesc "Racla lor O-zone."

Această racla e apărat din multe sistemi high-tech de securitate, cu tot cu laseri.

Ai fost în NYC când Dan Bălan şi Lucas Prata l-au cântat în limba engleză.

Ai ascultat zvonurile despre de ce grupul se au despicat, y regreţi că te-ai dus la concertul.

Ai fost aproabe târziu pentru că ai căutat it because you were looking for DiscO-zone or other merchandise on eBay and lost track of time.

I mean, another copy of DiscO-zone, obviously, because you've already got one. (guilty)

You had more than one already.

You own an O-zone t-shirt.

Said shirt was autographed by Dan Bălan.

Right now it is on a silk pillow in your O-zone shrine.

You own more than one O-zone t-shirt.

You own more than 5.

You own more than 10.

Even though you made most/all of them yourself.

More than one of them have been autographed by Dan Bălan.

You memorized the English version. (guilty)

You know the literal English translation. (guilty)

You could point out every difference between the English translation and the English version. (guilty)

The song has inspired you to learn Romanian. (guilty)

And now you're taking extremely expensive/inconvenient classes to learn it.

The English translation is a key part in your learning Romanian. (guilty)

This song has inspired you to go to Moldova. (guilty)

You know where Moldova is. (guilty)

And you know what the capital is. (guilty)

And you know what 3 languages are spoken there. (guilty)

You have an opinion on whether Romanian and Moldovan are in fact separate languages. (guilty)

You have heard at least one different version of this song. (not including Haiducii's) (guilty)

Including the version(s) they might have used for the "real" song but decided not to. (guilty)

You've written essays on what the world would be like if they had used a different version instead.

... And you lol'd at Dan's comics. (guilty)

... And you know what comics I'm talking about. (guilty)

You have memorized the full words of 3+ different versions of the song.

You've memorized the full words of 5+ versions.

And some parodies as well.

You've written a parody. (guilty)

You've written multiple parodies.

About stupid things, such as toast, or Pearl Harbor. (guilty)

You call people "haiduc." (guilty)

You call people "nebun" and/or "prost." (guilty)

Some random girl at school sang the first two lines, and your first reaction was "OMFG I think I'm going to either puke or start singing, or screaming!!!!!!! Or just dissolve into tears. Or maybe have a panic attack." (guilty)

Your next respose was to ask her if she even knows who Dan Bălan is, and get very offended when she says she doesn't.

You've combined this song with other obsessions/fandoms (Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, etc.) and thought it was DAMN funny! (guilty)

You know about "New Numa." (guilty)

I mean, you KNOW about it. Who made it, what it's really called, etc.

You felt like throwing up after hearing it. (guilty)

And every time after that you've even thought of it.

Until you realized that it could be a valuable resource in your learning to speak Romanian.

And you proceeded to listen to it 600 times even though you hate the song / it makes you nauseous / you despise anything that isn't the "real" Dragostea din Tei.

But then... oh horror of horrors... you learned... THAT SONG WASN'T EVEN IN ROMANIAN!! It was in Russian. :P

You have at least one folder on your computer which, when viewed with the "thumbnails" setting, has four little pictures -- all of which are of O-zone, Moldova, or anything else to do with this song. (guilty)

Said folder is -NOT- labelled "Dragostea din Tei." (guilty)

Although you do have one that is. (guilty)

More than half of your "My Documents" space is occupied by pictures of Dan Balan's mother's dog, the gum that Radu Sarbu chewed and spat out in a garbage can in Bucuresti six years ago, etc.

You know what Haiducii is. (guilty)

And you know that "haiducii" means "the outlaws." (guilty)

You keep seeing random people and thinking, "Wow, that guy really looks like Dan/Radu/Arsenie!" (guilty)

You keep seeing people and thinking, "Wow, that guy really looks like Gary Brolsma/Paula Mitrache/..." (guilty)

You've written pages about the literal translation of "dragostea din tei."

You write essays about what you think the title REALLY means. Cos, you know, "the love of linden trees?" It's a tad obscure, isn't it?

You have conspiracy theories about something involved with the song (eg. O-zone, the Numa video, etc.)

Your ringtone on your cell phone is a modified version of Dragostea din Tei.

You bought the cell phone in the first place JUST so you could have that as your ringtone.

You put the song on the request list at a dance. (guilty)

You were shocked and dismayed that they didn't play the song. Like, wth? It's practically a classic!! (guilty)

You don't go to dances anymore because they didn't play it. (guilty)

You don't go to dances anymore because everything else sucks. ("Once we have had a taste of excellence, we will settle for nothing less.") (guilty)

You were distraught to learn that O-zone split up like ages ago. (guilty)

And then you were ecstastic to hear you were mistaken.

And then someone told you they split up (again).

And you were distraught (again).

You know the year that they actually DID split up (sorry, dude, but they did, in fact). (guilty)

And you've heard rumors about why. (guilty)

And you wrote angry, angry letters to a certain DUDE... (guilty)

And you actually SENT these angry, angry letters to said dude...

And the dude wrote back...

To apologize to you...

And you totally forgave him. (guilty even tho I didn't send them ... I'm not sure I believe them anyway ... he ... can't .... )

You added Balan, Arsenium and RadU to your favorite music list.

Even though you don't like any of their post- O-zone music (or you've never heard it).

Even though you hate everything they've ever made.

You know who Arsenium is, and why I'm talking about him. (guilty)

And you know when his birthday is. (guilty)

And you sent him a card.

It was in Romanian.

All 4 of the above, applying to RadU.

All 4 of the above, applying to ... you know what I mean lol.

You recognize the name "Anastasia Delia." (guilty)

You've decided that tight white pants, black shirts that are half unbuttoned, and suspenders are the coolest outfit ever. (guilty)

You own at least one outfit just like the above. (guilty)

You keep it in a special place so it won't get dirty and wear it twice a year. (guilty)

You strongly disagree with the above statement, because I forgot to include CHARTREUSE shirts.

And also because I completely forgot to mention their SHOES.

Your entire wardrobe consists of white pants and black shirts. You wear nothing else.

You tried to get your brother to dress like that. (guilty)

Even though your brother is black / redhead / albino / Maori / etc.

You succeeded.

Even though you don't have a brother and had to use your sister instead.

You suddenly have a strange obsession with black sunglasses.

And you bought a pair just like Dan's. (guilty)

And you made your brother wear those too.

No, you DIDN'T buy a pair just like Dan's... you went on eBay and bought the actual sunglasses he was wearing in the video for $2,000.

You know that $2,000 is worth exactly 4,838 Romania New Lei.

You don't actually wear them, of course. They're on a silk pillow in a glass case in your O-zone shrine.

You actually noticed that in the music video, Dan's pants are a slightly different color of white than Radu's and Arsenie's. (guilty)

You found this significant enough to remember. (guilty)

And to post on the internet in five different places. (guilty)

And you came up with theories to explain this strange discrepancy.

The theories involve aliens.

The theories involve monkeys, ninja Picassos, and drunk cats.

You know how the above was at all relevant to Dragostea din Tei. (guilty)

You have made an avatar about Dragostea din Tei. (guilty)

You have made more than one. (guilty)

And you use them.

You made one about Arsenium / RadU / Crazy Loop. (guilty)

And you use that too.

You draw hearts all over the place, and you're not sure what that has to do with Dragostea din Tei, but you know it does. (guilty)

You call your girlfriend "Iubirea" and refer to yourself as "Fericirea." (guilty)

Or you call your boyfriend "Fericirea" and refer to yourself as "Iubirea." (guilty)

You talk about linden trees as though they were extremely romantic. Hey, they ARE, in Romania!

You freaked out when you heard that your neighbor has planted one in front of his/her house. (guilty)

You stole a leaf and pinned it to the wall in your O-zone shrine.

You make sure to point out Romania to your friends whenever you see a map of Europe. (guilty)

People think you're of Romanian descent JUST because of your obsession with that area. (It also helps if you "look a little Romanian," as I apparently do, LOL) (guilty)

You grin like a maniac whenever you see anything with blue, yellow, red in that order. (guilty)

And if you hear an airplane through the window during a Social Studies test. (guilty)

And if anyone says the word "new," "ma," or "yay."

Whenever you take a plane anywhere, you sing this song constantly and insist that whoever's sitting next to you joins in for the chorus.

You bribe flight attendants to let you ride on the wing. (guilty)

And you're dead serious.

You love Dan, Radu or Arsenie specifically so much that when you talk about the other two, you refer to them as "_________'s friends" instead of using their names.

You ONLY answer the phone "Alo?"

When someone asks you who's calling, you say "sunt eu, [your name / Picasso / un haiduc / fericirea]" (guilty)

Whenever you're outside, you search the heavens for planes. (guilty)

Whenever you walk past a window, you lean out of it and search the heavens for planes. (guilty)

If you don't see one, you're very sad.

If you DO see one, you burst into song.

And/or you drop to your knees and scream "TAKE ME WITH YOU!!"

Only you say it in Romanian.

If at any point during this sequence, anyone asks you what is up with your obsession with flying machines, you explain to them that some of your fondest memories involve airplanes.

People think it's really funny to point at the very solid white plaster ceiling in the kitchen and say "hey look, an airplane! And omg, it has 3 guys standing on the wing of it!!" (guilty)

And you ALWAYS fall for it.

You pretend to be related to Dan/Radu/Arsenie/all three. (used to be guilty)

You saw a picture of Arsenie Todiras smoking a cigarette / with his arm around that blonde bikini chick in the Eurovision / etc. and were very depressed once the shock wore off. (2x guilty and mildly nauseated)

You become thoroughly overexcited whenever you see a thin black-haired guy, especially with sunglasses. (guilty)

Even when you KNOW it's ONLY Orlando Bloom, nothing to get excited about... (guilty)

Wait... Orlando Bloom who? (guilty)

You have the lyrics written down in a place that you see several times a day. (guilty)

You have them written down in more than 5 places.

More than 10.

EVERYWHERE... the back of a shopping list, parking tickets, the flyleaf of a library book...

You write stuff like "Radu is really hot" on the wall in the bathroom. (guilty)

Even though you're a guy.

You have a picture of yourself and some friends, and you compared it (at least mentally) to a picture of O-zone. (guilty)

You have two flags outside your house; one of them is Romanian.

The other is Moldovan.

Your screen saver has to do with Dragostea din Tei or O-zone.

Your screen saver has to do with Romania or Moldova. (guilty)

You have heard that that DDT is a chemical that destroys the ozone layer. (guilty)

You find this incredibly creepy. (guilty)

Three words: barely concealed hysteria. (guilty)

If, by some insane quirk of fate, you and your friend(s) were walking down the street and saw Dan, Radu or Arsenie, they would be sure to distract you so you wouldn't:

a) Burst into song and force everyone present to sing along

b) Drop to your knees and beg for an autograph

c) Pass out, hit your head on the curb, and need to be taken to the hospital

d) Execute Step 1 of your master plan

You know what I mean by "master plan."

You have one.

You write "salut!" on the back of every dusty car you walk past. (guilty)

You claim it's mandatory for your religion. (guilty)

And you're dead serious.

You know about the "secret messages" that are heard when the song is played backwards. (guilty)

You know what they are. (guilty)

You DON'T know what they are because you were too much of a chickenshit to click the link. (I was guilty at first)

You have a major obsession with Romania and/or Moldova that was caused by this song. (guilty)

You said yes to a number of things on this list concerning Dan Bălan, even though you dislike/hate him. (HM, I WONDER WHY THAT COULD BE....)

You said yes to a number of things on this list concerning Radu Sîrbu, even though you dislike/hate him.

You said yes to a number of things on this list concerning Arsenie Toderaş, even though you dislike/hate him. (guilty)

You write lists about how you know you're obsessed with Dragostea din Tei. (guilty)

And... you put them on your website. (super-mega-uber-extra-guilty)

Got your own? I'd love to hear them! Feel free to send 'em to me at charlotte@gizmology.net and maybe I'll put them on the site.

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